Three months have passed since I started law school, and I find myself home again for Thanksgiving. I haven't been back since my brother's wedding 2 months before. Things seem more different now, as he has moved out, Milo has passed, and in his place, is an English bulldog named Popi.
I remember the days coming home from college for Thanksgiving - it was always exciting simply to make that three hour drive home from Saratoga. In fact, that feeling was apparent before I left from CT. I don't know if it was the three hour drive, or the near fender bender that I experienced on the highway coming home in the midst of the snarling traffic, but things just seemed...different. The house is much quieter and quite frankly, there wasn't a significant angst on my part to seek out long lost friends immediately. All I really wanted to do was sit home, do nothing, and watch television (which I did).
For the past couple of months, I've managed to bury myself in my books to the extent never seen before. Unlike undergrad, I constantly feel the need to be doing something law related at any given time. There is a particular itch that can only be satisfied by doing as such. However, there are times that even though I don't feel like studying, I still do it for the sake of doing it. I'm unsure as to the productive nature of this technique, but I've seemingly placed a severe burden on my shoulders.
For the first time in my life, I've managed to cut out most distractions that have characterized my secondary and undergraduate education; no sports, no job, no extracurriculars, barely a social life, but still a gf to keep my sane. By cutting out these distractions, I can focus exclusively on my studies - which, in turn, has created this tension that I have with myself because I no longer have the excuses that conveniently accompanied my academic life until now. If I fail to perform to these standards, I will have, in essence, failed myself, which is not something that I can take lightly.
Therefore, I've invested the time and the effort. Unfortunately, I don't know how this will all fare in the end. It seems that my class is filled with a lot of very talented, smart, and driven people. I find myself comparing my academic achievements with them all the time, and it just scares me. We have so many ivy-leaguers on my campus, that I can't help but fear the type of competition that is brewing amongst my classmates.
Yet, all I really have is a collective sense of hard work, motivation, and substantial amounts of pre-law school preparation that I'm almost sure many people don't have. Will this different approach to law school work? Or will I be subject to the performances that have characterized my academic achievements in the past?
I have heard that the key to success in law school is doing what you did in undergrad and being comfortable with how you study. To the contrary, I am doing something that I haven't done in undergrad. In the end, I hope it works out. However, until then, I will be relegated to the constant fear of under-performing, coupled with anxiety and nervousness. I have been told to learn to relax, except I can't - not with this year standing between me and my goals.
I think I'll look good in a power suit.
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
Thursday, October 4, 2007
October in Hartford
Strange as it may sound, I've been a law student for over six weeks now. The classes and the format of the curriculum has been everything I've come to expect, thanks in part to the wonderful author of Planet Law School. Hartford has it's charm, but the true benefit of this capital city is the fact that it is not Boston or NYC. Devoid of major nightlife, Hartford is a good place if you want to study and not be distracted from all these factors that make a city, well, a city.
As far as I can tell, the student body lacks the social requisite to rival that of undergrad. The general consensus, it seems, is that students are either too focused on their work to provide a cohesive environment for social events, or they simply lack the capacity to interact without the guiding hand of the undergraduate dormitory environment (or keggers on the weekends in which to co-mingle). Nevertheless, there is a deep division between the sections, utterly leaving half the class completely unaware of the happenings of the other half, merely because the two sections (and the night section) don't come together at any point in time.
Further, the commuter nature of the law school seems to be conducive to the anti-social aura that seems to characterize the law school. I guess that is what happens when a law school stands on its own, far from its parent institution, and which doesn't have the facilities to hold a dorm, thus unable to form a cohesive community.
In place of a live, face to face interactive community, we are left with a community that is predicated on an outdated email system (which I've managed to forward all the mail to my gmail account), not to mention artificially constructed community forums in the shape of facebook. The progression of a physically interactive community to one that is online contributes, most probably, to the seclusive nature of the law school and its student body.
Granted, it could very well be that I am among the masses of anti-socialites. For the first time in my academic career, I have chosen to remain intently focused on my studies alone - barring all other distractions. How this choice will ultimately impact my academic performance remains to be seen. This much I know is true: law school is not a laughing matter. People come to law school (at least the serious ones) because they know what they want in life; everything else gets set on the backburner. Given the innate characteristics of those masochistic people that apply to law school, it should be a well known fact that the law school environment should embody a sense of subverted competition, which I hope will push the envelope in terms of mental development towards the law.
So far, I'm thriving in this environment. The independent nature of legal studies has been conducive to my own independent tendencies. We'll just have to wait and see if this lifestyle will ultimately translate into positive results in the end.
As far as I can tell, the student body lacks the social requisite to rival that of undergrad. The general consensus, it seems, is that students are either too focused on their work to provide a cohesive environment for social events, or they simply lack the capacity to interact without the guiding hand of the undergraduate dormitory environment (or keggers on the weekends in which to co-mingle). Nevertheless, there is a deep division between the sections, utterly leaving half the class completely unaware of the happenings of the other half, merely because the two sections (and the night section) don't come together at any point in time.
Further, the commuter nature of the law school seems to be conducive to the anti-social aura that seems to characterize the law school. I guess that is what happens when a law school stands on its own, far from its parent institution, and which doesn't have the facilities to hold a dorm, thus unable to form a cohesive community.
In place of a live, face to face interactive community, we are left with a community that is predicated on an outdated email system (which I've managed to forward all the mail to my gmail account), not to mention artificially constructed community forums in the shape of facebook. The progression of a physically interactive community to one that is online contributes, most probably, to the seclusive nature of the law school and its student body.
Granted, it could very well be that I am among the masses of anti-socialites. For the first time in my academic career, I have chosen to remain intently focused on my studies alone - barring all other distractions. How this choice will ultimately impact my academic performance remains to be seen. This much I know is true: law school is not a laughing matter. People come to law school (at least the serious ones) because they know what they want in life; everything else gets set on the backburner. Given the innate characteristics of those masochistic people that apply to law school, it should be a well known fact that the law school environment should embody a sense of subverted competition, which I hope will push the envelope in terms of mental development towards the law.
So far, I'm thriving in this environment. The independent nature of legal studies has been conducive to my own independent tendencies. We'll just have to wait and see if this lifestyle will ultimately translate into positive results in the end.
Monday, September 3, 2007
Synthesizing My Workload
So the first week of law school came and went, and nothing truly surprised me. I expected the workload to be heavy, which came to fruition quite quickly, even before school started, when I had to read two books during orientation. Diversity is lacking in the student body, but again, that is to be expected because I'm at a Connecticut state school. It doesn't bother me though, as I feel like I've grown past that stage of awkwardness.
Hartford is pleasant at the moment. The laid back atmosphere as compared to Boston is a welcomed change. I like how so many dining and shopping options are readily available, or at least within a short drive. I also am intrigued by the diversity that this town has - leaving me on my toes more often than none.
The hardest part of law school, on top of reading and processing the cases, is really to keep an open mind to the larger picture. Why are we reading these cases? Why are we reading this case (Pennoyer v. Neff in Civil Procedure) that has been overruled by the Supreme Court many years ago? How do they all fit in? The short answer to these roundabout questions is that I think the professors are trying to get us to think about how the policy of the law evolved into the elements of that particular law in the present day. Rather than focus on the minute details of the case facts (of course, that is important so that I don't look like a retard in class), I should really try to understand the case from a policy standpoint, as well as to make sure that I understand the black letter law that is applicable to other variations of the case. How can I change the facts of the particular case, or create one from my own imagination, so much so that the elements of the black letter law applies? How can I change it enough so that it no longer applies?
Planet Law School thus far has proven to be helpful in a sense that the book has allowed me to put my learning into perspective early. In fact, I hope that this mindset is exactly what I have to do (I'm banking on it!). I am yet to feel comfortable discussing the cases in a more thorough manner with my classmates as of the first week, most simply because I don't think any of us, myself included, have had enough law school to see what's going on. In the meanwhile, I feel that my writing these entries will help me understand the concepts of what I'm reading a little more. In a sense, this will help me synthesize my thoughts.
Civil Procedure:
So far, we've read Pennoyer v. Neff and a few other cases dealing with personal jursidiction. Pennoyer is no longer applicable, but it is seemingly the foundational building blocks of personal jurisdiction - when is it applicable and how can the courts use it? I think this course is following closely with Glannon's study aid, which will be helpful to get a different perspective.
Torts:
The cases we've read in the first week deal primarily with Duty: when does someone owe a duty to another person? Starting with Walters v. Walmart, we got a very basic taste of torts and quite frankly, and easy application of the duty clause: the employee admitted to the tortuous action.
Contracts:
We've read the most cases for this class, but many of them are short. The class thus far has touched upon the notion of privity, and a few elements of a contract (K = offer + acceptance and consideration). The first week dealt primarily with consideration, and what is required for consideration in a contract.
Criminal Law:
This class has been a blur to me. Professor Wilf has provided very little structure, yet he reminds me of Dr. Rotheim. Hopefully, I'll be able to develop some kind of commodore with him the same way I did with Rotheim. Quite frankly, I have no idea what's going on in this class, but I hope it will turnout great because of the subject matter.
Lawyering Process:
I was inspired to write this entry because of LP. The class assignments will be hard, and writing isn't necessarily my strong suit. But the class allowed me to look into the other classes with a different lense: Basically, we're looking at a few cases to formulate a 'black letter law' and its elements for the intentional infliction of emotional stress. In the same way, that is exactly what we're doing with all the cases in the other classes. We need to look at a set of cases to see where a particular law came from and how it was developed. As long as I keep that perspective, I think, in fact, I hope, I will have somewhat of an informed advantage over my classmates. But then again, I'm very open to sharing and collaborating.
Until next time.
Hartford is pleasant at the moment. The laid back atmosphere as compared to Boston is a welcomed change. I like how so many dining and shopping options are readily available, or at least within a short drive. I also am intrigued by the diversity that this town has - leaving me on my toes more often than none.
The hardest part of law school, on top of reading and processing the cases, is really to keep an open mind to the larger picture. Why are we reading these cases? Why are we reading this case (Pennoyer v. Neff in Civil Procedure) that has been overruled by the Supreme Court many years ago? How do they all fit in? The short answer to these roundabout questions is that I think the professors are trying to get us to think about how the policy of the law evolved into the elements of that particular law in the present day. Rather than focus on the minute details of the case facts (of course, that is important so that I don't look like a retard in class), I should really try to understand the case from a policy standpoint, as well as to make sure that I understand the black letter law that is applicable to other variations of the case. How can I change the facts of the particular case, or create one from my own imagination, so much so that the elements of the black letter law applies? How can I change it enough so that it no longer applies?
Planet Law School thus far has proven to be helpful in a sense that the book has allowed me to put my learning into perspective early. In fact, I hope that this mindset is exactly what I have to do (I'm banking on it!). I am yet to feel comfortable discussing the cases in a more thorough manner with my classmates as of the first week, most simply because I don't think any of us, myself included, have had enough law school to see what's going on. In the meanwhile, I feel that my writing these entries will help me understand the concepts of what I'm reading a little more. In a sense, this will help me synthesize my thoughts.
Civil Procedure:
So far, we've read Pennoyer v. Neff and a few other cases dealing with personal jursidiction. Pennoyer is no longer applicable, but it is seemingly the foundational building blocks of personal jurisdiction - when is it applicable and how can the courts use it? I think this course is following closely with Glannon's study aid, which will be helpful to get a different perspective.
Torts:
The cases we've read in the first week deal primarily with Duty: when does someone owe a duty to another person? Starting with Walters v. Walmart, we got a very basic taste of torts and quite frankly, and easy application of the duty clause: the employee admitted to the tortuous action.
Contracts:
We've read the most cases for this class, but many of them are short. The class thus far has touched upon the notion of privity, and a few elements of a contract (K = offer + acceptance and consideration). The first week dealt primarily with consideration, and what is required for consideration in a contract.
Criminal Law:
This class has been a blur to me. Professor Wilf has provided very little structure, yet he reminds me of Dr. Rotheim. Hopefully, I'll be able to develop some kind of commodore with him the same way I did with Rotheim. Quite frankly, I have no idea what's going on in this class, but I hope it will turnout great because of the subject matter.
Lawyering Process:
I was inspired to write this entry because of LP. The class assignments will be hard, and writing isn't necessarily my strong suit. But the class allowed me to look into the other classes with a different lense: Basically, we're looking at a few cases to formulate a 'black letter law' and its elements for the intentional infliction of emotional stress. In the same way, that is exactly what we're doing with all the cases in the other classes. We need to look at a set of cases to see where a particular law came from and how it was developed. As long as I keep that perspective, I think, in fact, I hope, I will have somewhat of an informed advantage over my classmates. But then again, I'm very open to sharing and collaborating.
Until next time.
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
First official day in Hartford
It's strange that a little over a month ago, I was traveling the unexplored regions of Southeast Asia and in what appears to be a blink of an eye, I have been deposed in Hartford, CT - home of the largest conglomerate of insurance companies in the world. The transition has been remarkable - considering the drastic spectrum that I have traveled since my time on the other side of the world. Of course, my deposition in Hartford merely signifies the end of my freedom, and quite possibly the end of one of the best summers of my life: the first summer in a long time in which I did not have to work.
Hartford also symbolizes the beginning of much hard work, time sacrifice, and intense focus - the likes of which I have not experienced since the end of that tumultuous senior year in college, where I managed to pull off crew, a year long senior thesis, work study, and a full course load to boot. Alas, the fun has come to an end, and it is finally time to move on to bigger and better things in Connecticut.
Hartford has a way of welcoming visitors into the warm open arms of the city streets; and by this I meant my experience this morning - when upon exiting my apartment, I discovered that my car had been towed from Farmington Ave. In retrospect, I should have been more attentive to the signs - not taking any risks in a new city. But then again, I was heeding to the calls of nature, not to mention I was frustrated from the shear amount of loose packing my parents managed to shove into my car before I departed.
Nevertheless, the car debacle resulted in me having to run the 3.6 miles to Corona's Towing - costing me not only my morning (I did manage to squeeze a workout from the ordeal), but also nearly $140 in which I will never get to use for any purpose other than retrieve my vehicle. Lesson learned: I will no longer drive my car at night - and I shall refrain from parking my car on any major roads in Hartford for the remainder of my time here.
This lesson could have simply been handed to me on a piece of paper. Instead, I had to learn the hard way. But I am a firm believer in the silver lining within every dark cloud. While I was running angrily towards Corona's, I ran through what many would consider the so called 'ghetto' of East Hartford. In my opinion, my run two weeks ago through Albany Ave. appeared to be far worst in terms of infrastructure and overall negative effect.
However, something dawned on me while on the run: There is a pervasive culture among the white elite (i.e. those who grew up among a white majority in mostly affluent suburbs) where anything that does not resemble their general white neighborhoods, may very well be perceived as a threat. A major reason for this may be attributed to media portrayal (i.e. Training Day, Boyz in the Hood, Replacement Killers, to name a few quickly off the top of my head), where the ethnic minority are generally portrayed to be up to something sketchy. What happens thereafter is the permeation of stereotypes that form the basis of fear among the white elite, thereby causing them to skip out entirely on those regions deemed to be 'unsafe' (translation: ethnic neighborhoods).
But I ask you this: how many of the people that I have spoken to - who have warned me about the dangers of certain neighborhoods - have actually stepped foot and interacted with people in those neighborhoods? Granted, I am not advertising that I have not succumbed to media portrayals - but at least I can say that I have managed to accidentally throw myself into the middle of these areas deemed to be 'unsafe' (I still wouldn't run there at night), and would continue to do so (albeit unintentionally) until otherwise. What I saw today - in spite of a few sketchy characters lining the streets at 11am - were fully developed ethnic neighborhoods with a strong sense of community, particularly that of the Latin population in East Hartford. In fact, the neighborhood around Park St. reminded me of the Chinatown ghettos in which I have I have been a part - just people trying to make a living - supporting one another in some way possible. Even the neighborhood around Trinity College (Broad St) didn't seem that bad at first glance, in the morning, especially after hearing dire warnings from people to avoid the neighborhood outside of Trinity's campus at all costs.
Perhaps I need to make myself more available for these kinds of situations. What I truly enjoy about living in Hartford - aside from not being towed - is the diversity that is prevalent throughout the city; a diversity that cannot be found in places like Saratoga Springs, NY or any other small towns that harbor college students. That way, the diversity will hopefully open eyes as to the world beyond the sheltered lives of many of us who pursue advanced degrees, and even college degrees, so that we may truly understand one another beyond the media-portrayals of the news and Hollywood. I may not say yes to any business propositions from some guy name Tyrone outside of the Dollar Store in Farmington, but at least I will not avoid him, but shake his hand confidently, and smile when I introduce myself and say "No" to whatever the heck he wants to sell.
Wednesday, August 8, 2007
Albany Avenue
I want to remember all of my pre-law school sentiments so that one day, I can reflect on them and laugh. I took the liberty yesterday to drive down to Hartford in order to set up my apartment, along with cable and all the good things. After a full day of painstaking yet enjoyable organization, I decided to go for a run to discover my new neighborhood.
Unfortunately, after running through beautiful West Hartford and Elizabeth Park, I made the wrong turn after exiting the park and proceeded to head east towards Albany Avenue. The ensuing 15 minutes were quite nerve-racking in a sense that all my previously harbored prejudices came into complete fruition. I must remind myself that it was Marc who planted the dangerous neighborhood notion in my head prior to my run.
With that attitude firmly in my conscience, I proceeded to run through ill-kept grassy fields, abandoned warehouses, run down tenements and houses, as well as a few commercial properties that seemed to have closed down years ago. Not surprisingly, I picked up my pace through this neighborhood, as I frantically searched for the safe haven of West Hartford in my mind. Even though the run through the neighborhood was relatively brief, it left a solid impression in my mind about the incredible diversity that exists in Hartford, and not all of that is good.
I have never thought of myself as one to harbor prejudices. In a sense, I guess everyone has the same preconceived notions - whether those notions are developed through the media, through family, or through some white guy from Vermont. The run was certainly a fantastic introduction into my neighborhood for possibly the next three years, and there is no doubt in my mind that these impressions will dictate my future runs in the neighborhood. I just hope that future instances and more exposure to the intricacies of Hartford will work towards quelling this unrealized fear of the supposedly more dangerous neighborhoods.
Unfortunately, after running through beautiful West Hartford and Elizabeth Park, I made the wrong turn after exiting the park and proceeded to head east towards Albany Avenue. The ensuing 15 minutes were quite nerve-racking in a sense that all my previously harbored prejudices came into complete fruition. I must remind myself that it was Marc who planted the dangerous neighborhood notion in my head prior to my run.
With that attitude firmly in my conscience, I proceeded to run through ill-kept grassy fields, abandoned warehouses, run down tenements and houses, as well as a few commercial properties that seemed to have closed down years ago. Not surprisingly, I picked up my pace through this neighborhood, as I frantically searched for the safe haven of West Hartford in my mind. Even though the run through the neighborhood was relatively brief, it left a solid impression in my mind about the incredible diversity that exists in Hartford, and not all of that is good.
I have never thought of myself as one to harbor prejudices. In a sense, I guess everyone has the same preconceived notions - whether those notions are developed through the media, through family, or through some white guy from Vermont. The run was certainly a fantastic introduction into my neighborhood for possibly the next three years, and there is no doubt in my mind that these impressions will dictate my future runs in the neighborhood. I just hope that future instances and more exposure to the intricacies of Hartford will work towards quelling this unrealized fear of the supposedly more dangerous neighborhoods.
Sunday, August 5, 2007
The first year, they scare you to death...
It has been a while since I've even had time to write in this blog. My trip postings have been relegated to facebook, so there was no need for me to explore my thoughts through this blog. It has been over two weeks, however, since my eminent return from Asia, and I think it should probably be time for me to write again as I try to gather my thoughts for the first steps to the rest of my life.
There have been so many things that I have wanted to post on this blog: reflections on my past with lacrosse in Concord, my general sentiments towards leaving home (good and bad), as well as the things that seem the most important to me at this point in my life. Unfortunately, most of the thoughts associated with those topics come in passing, and therefore, I have lost the motivation to write what is deeply significant about those topics.
Instead, as boring as this may sound, I choose to write about my thought process leading up to law school because, quite frankly, it is these kinds of thoughts that I will be happy to look back to in order to gauge my intellectual and personal growth throughout this law school process. For the past two and a half weeks, I have been a machine - gathering up the necessary components in order to facilitate a smooth transition to law school in Hartford. I have bought the furniture, drove down twice with my father, and managed to set up most of the major components. There is another trip in the next few days to put an end to the early preparation.
In a sense, I am trying to get an early advantage to those that may have more of a time crunch than I do. I understand that law school will be immensely challenging, therefore I am seeking to gain whatever advantage I have over my classmates in terms of preparation. At the same time, this advantage is negated because I continue to doubt my abilities to compete with so many students that seem to have a distinct educational advantage over me - students, who may have chosen to attend UConn because of the cost efficiency in the program, and not necessarily because they were not accepted at other schools. Second guessing my abilities has become prevalent as I read and try to understand the "Learning Legal Reasoning" book by John Delaney.
I continue to worry about the social structure of the law school, as well as the Hartford surroundings. In a sense, I do not want to repeat the turbulent social environment in which I was exposed to in the beginning of college, where I seemingly interacted with people who did not share the same interests, and with whom I did not make significant connections with. I am fearful, as I was probably at the start of college, of not being able to connect with my new classmates - some of whom are straight from college, whereas others may be in the same situation that I am - having taken some years off before deciding for law school. How will my social situation justify my leaving the comforts of Boston for the whole new environment of Hartford?
At the same time, I am also fearful of living on my own - not in the sense that I will not be able to handle my own meals/sanitary issues. But rather, I am fearful of how I will adapt to simply being on my own. I think as time marches on, I realize even more that even though I enjoy plenty of time on my own, I also relish and enjoy in the company of others. Living on my own, therefore, will require an initial adaptation process that hopefully will turn out for the better. At the present moment though, the aspect that I most look forward to is not necessarily sitting down and absorbing the intricacies of the law, but rather the prospect of finally being free from the imaginary cage that is my parents' home. The founded fears of living alone essentially takes a back seat to this even larger accomplishment.
I must admit that I have enjoyed hanging out with my parents since returning from Asia. With my brother busy in preparation for his wedding, and my sister practically traveling the world, I am designated to be the de facto progeny - which has resulted in many hours driving in the car to various places with both my parents. They have been gracious enough to support many of my shopping/moving endeavors in the last two weeks and I, in return, have been providing them with glimpses and answers to the enigma that is their children (except, I must admit, that their knowledge of their children grows far beyond what I comprehend about them). Nevertheless, it's time for me to move on - to finally be out from under the protective wing of my parents.
I choose to do most of this law school process of my life by myself in hopes of gaining independence for myself, and away from my parents. For the first time, they will really play a secondary position to my life, unlike college, in which they controlled my well-being from a financial standpoint (which I still owe them a lot for). They may not know it now, but for the most part, these last two years will certainly be the last two years that I will hopefully not live under their roof because I plan on moving somewhere, anywhere, in order to secure this final step of 'growing up'. Not a moment too soon, I suppose, because my family from Vietnam plans to inundate my house come September.
All things happen for a reason, whether I consider them to be good or bad at the moment. As I have always talked about with friends, everything will work out in the end. I'm a firm believer in luck = preparation + opportunity. I hope everything turns out well.
There have been so many things that I have wanted to post on this blog: reflections on my past with lacrosse in Concord, my general sentiments towards leaving home (good and bad), as well as the things that seem the most important to me at this point in my life. Unfortunately, most of the thoughts associated with those topics come in passing, and therefore, I have lost the motivation to write what is deeply significant about those topics.
Instead, as boring as this may sound, I choose to write about my thought process leading up to law school because, quite frankly, it is these kinds of thoughts that I will be happy to look back to in order to gauge my intellectual and personal growth throughout this law school process. For the past two and a half weeks, I have been a machine - gathering up the necessary components in order to facilitate a smooth transition to law school in Hartford. I have bought the furniture, drove down twice with my father, and managed to set up most of the major components. There is another trip in the next few days to put an end to the early preparation.
In a sense, I am trying to get an early advantage to those that may have more of a time crunch than I do. I understand that law school will be immensely challenging, therefore I am seeking to gain whatever advantage I have over my classmates in terms of preparation. At the same time, this advantage is negated because I continue to doubt my abilities to compete with so many students that seem to have a distinct educational advantage over me - students, who may have chosen to attend UConn because of the cost efficiency in the program, and not necessarily because they were not accepted at other schools. Second guessing my abilities has become prevalent as I read and try to understand the "Learning Legal Reasoning" book by John Delaney.
I continue to worry about the social structure of the law school, as well as the Hartford surroundings. In a sense, I do not want to repeat the turbulent social environment in which I was exposed to in the beginning of college, where I seemingly interacted with people who did not share the same interests, and with whom I did not make significant connections with. I am fearful, as I was probably at the start of college, of not being able to connect with my new classmates - some of whom are straight from college, whereas others may be in the same situation that I am - having taken some years off before deciding for law school. How will my social situation justify my leaving the comforts of Boston for the whole new environment of Hartford?
At the same time, I am also fearful of living on my own - not in the sense that I will not be able to handle my own meals/sanitary issues. But rather, I am fearful of how I will adapt to simply being on my own. I think as time marches on, I realize even more that even though I enjoy plenty of time on my own, I also relish and enjoy in the company of others. Living on my own, therefore, will require an initial adaptation process that hopefully will turn out for the better. At the present moment though, the aspect that I most look forward to is not necessarily sitting down and absorbing the intricacies of the law, but rather the prospect of finally being free from the imaginary cage that is my parents' home. The founded fears of living alone essentially takes a back seat to this even larger accomplishment.
I must admit that I have enjoyed hanging out with my parents since returning from Asia. With my brother busy in preparation for his wedding, and my sister practically traveling the world, I am designated to be the de facto progeny - which has resulted in many hours driving in the car to various places with both my parents. They have been gracious enough to support many of my shopping/moving endeavors in the last two weeks and I, in return, have been providing them with glimpses and answers to the enigma that is their children (except, I must admit, that their knowledge of their children grows far beyond what I comprehend about them). Nevertheless, it's time for me to move on - to finally be out from under the protective wing of my parents.
I choose to do most of this law school process of my life by myself in hopes of gaining independence for myself, and away from my parents. For the first time, they will really play a secondary position to my life, unlike college, in which they controlled my well-being from a financial standpoint (which I still owe them a lot for). They may not know it now, but for the most part, these last two years will certainly be the last two years that I will hopefully not live under their roof because I plan on moving somewhere, anywhere, in order to secure this final step of 'growing up'. Not a moment too soon, I suppose, because my family from Vietnam plans to inundate my house come September.
All things happen for a reason, whether I consider them to be good or bad at the moment. As I have always talked about with friends, everything will work out in the end. I'm a firm believer in luck = preparation + opportunity. I hope everything turns out well.
Tuesday, June 5, 2007
8 Hours Before Departure
It's 12:48am, and I am sitting on my bed, watching the Red Sox in a nail-biter of a game with the A's. I'm scheduled to leave the house in approximately five hours for the airport - where my flight leaves for Chicago at 9am. I am strangely relaxed, considering I am moments away from embarking on a journey half way around the world - armed with nothing more than my wit, a basic understanding of Mandarin, and a Lonely Planet-type book (actually, I couldn't afford Lonely Planet so I went for the 8th best thing: Frodders).
My backpack is stuffed to the brink. Apparently, I should have listened to Noel and spent the extra 20 dollars to buy a larger backpack...there goes my silly cheap-ness again. May I not succumb myself to the detriment of my own preferences again.
Hal, my travel companion, is noticeably nervous, as he strolls in and out of my room, contemplating smoking cigarettes in my driveway. Of course, his fears are certainly founded, considering this will indeed be an exciting and nerve-racking adventure for the both of us.
Since I have seemingly secured all the necessary components to guarantee a smooth transition to law school after I return, I have nothing left to worry about on this trip, except how to get from one desired destination to another, and when my next meal is going to be. Needless to say, I hope I can act swiftly on my feet, and rely on resourcefulness to navigate cultural and linguistic barriers.
First stop: Hong Kong
My backpack is stuffed to the brink. Apparently, I should have listened to Noel and spent the extra 20 dollars to buy a larger backpack...there goes my silly cheap-ness again. May I not succumb myself to the detriment of my own preferences again.
Hal, my travel companion, is noticeably nervous, as he strolls in and out of my room, contemplating smoking cigarettes in my driveway. Of course, his fears are certainly founded, considering this will indeed be an exciting and nerve-racking adventure for the both of us.
Since I have seemingly secured all the necessary components to guarantee a smooth transition to law school after I return, I have nothing left to worry about on this trip, except how to get from one desired destination to another, and when my next meal is going to be. Needless to say, I hope I can act swiftly on my feet, and rely on resourcefulness to navigate cultural and linguistic barriers.
First stop: Hong Kong
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